GA lot of people think of “Judge Judy” Sheindlin as America’s most entertaining jurist, not to mention highest paid at $47 million a year.

But, she’s been toppled from her crown by President Donald J. Trump, who has never met a pardon request he didn’t like – as long it’s from his friends, political allies, or someone who can make him richer.

It doesn’t matter if the convict has fleeced billions from hardworking Americans or once ran a Latin American narco-state and was convicted of conspiring to traffic 400 tons of cocaine into the United States.

The commander-in-chief hands out pardons like peppermint mints at Christmas. He’s at 1,600 and counting, including roughly 1,500 Proud Boys, Oath Keepers and others who mounted the Jan. 6 Capitol riot he helped unleash.

Love it or hate it, Trump is America’s judge and jury until 2028.

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Justice With Donny J

For the sake of levity and temporary escape from the pain Trump is inflicting on America and the Constitution, imagine the president as the star of a new reality TV court show, “Justice With Donny J.” His co-star is FBI Director Kash Patel as the bailiff. Trump political adviser Roger Stone is the narrator.

Here’s a sampling from the pilot episode:

Narrator: “Felix K. Luxemborg is accused of taking a blow torch to his ex-wife’s new Mercedes. Anna Luxemborg declined to press charges but is seeking $10,000 because she didn’t have gap insurance, and another $5,000 for emotional damages. He’s countersuing for the same amount, $15,000, for defamation of character. It’s a Case of Burning Love.”

Donny J: “Alright, Felix. Are you a Democrat?”

Felix: “I don’t vote.”

Donny J: “You know they stole the 2020 election. Voter fraud everywhere in those blue states. Illegals voting all over the place, and we can prove it. There are some good Democrats, a few. But most of them are vicious. Just nasty, nasty people.

“Anna, do you have proof it was Felix that torched your car? You’re going to need proof because I don’t allow witch hunts in my court. The Democrats, it’s nothing but witch hunts. Russia, Russia, Russia. Putin, Putin, Putin. But nothing on Hunter Biden’s laptop. Nothing on Hillary. Do you know some court said I needed to pay a million dollars because I sued her. They called it a ‘frivolous’ lawsuit. Frivolous, they said.

“Before I rule, I want to hear you both yell “LOCK HER UP!” Give it all you got. Make Rudy Giuliani proud. You know, he could use a boost right now. A great American. It’s sad what they did to him. Sad. Truly sad.

Felix: “LOCK HER UP!!!”

Donny J: “Bailiff, what are the decibels? I’m impressed. We want you at my next rally, Felix. Are you sure you’re not a Republican? All the smart people are Republicans. They know why we need tariffs. China, NATO, they’ve all been treating us rough. Really rough. But I’m getting them to pay their share. You better believe it. I’m the only one. Obama couldn’t do it. Sleepy Joe couldn’t do it.”

Bailiff: “95 decibels, Judge Donny J. That’s like a crowing rooster.”

Donny J: Anna, show me what you got, honey. Can I say honey? Some people don’t want me to. They say I’ll get canceled. Canceled. But we’re fixing that. I killed cancel culture. I don’t know, but that’s what people are saying. Really smart people. Hannity, Tucker, they’re all saying it. Donny J canceled cancel culture. Hey, that’s pretty good. First time I’ve said it. I canceled cancel culture.”

Anna: “LOCK HER UP!!!!!!!!!!

Donny J: “That was loud. Really loud. Louder than a Democrat screaming about my Big Beautiful Bill. That bill is something, a really beautiful, really fantastic thing. Oh, you wait and see how it all works out. Beautiful, fantastic. It’s going to fix health care. It’s weeding out waste and fraud. Going to save trillions and trillions. Obama couldn’t do it, Sleepy Joe couldn’t do it. But I did it. The people are going to thank me. They truly are.”

Bailiff: The decibels hit 100, Judge Donny J. That’s as loud as a Harley.”

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The Verdict

Donny J: Remember Bikers for Trump? Good guys. Great guys. Everyone of them. Loved those guys. They started with just a few guys and ended up with 30,000, maybe more. I don’t know, that’s what they tell me. It’s probably true, 30,000. It could be more. Did you know they formed a PAC? Here they were, out riding Harleys, and then they’re doing security for me, really beautiful security, you don’t mess with those guys. I’m tellin’ you. And then they’re into politics, raising money. It’s a beautiful thing. Fantastic. Really beautiful.

Bailiff:  “Judge Donny J, what is your verdict?”

Donny J: “I’m awarding Felix $15,000 in Trump crypto. Sorry, Anna. You’re a beautiful girl and you screamed your lungs out. You really, really did. But you should’ve bought a Tesla.”